the straggled musings of a nurse/therapist

I’m Still Me!-When sin is conspicuous

I recently sat with someone who shared about key players in their life who objected to some of their life choices. This person described how a few of these relationships changed, becoming charged with tension, disapproval, and sometimes rejection. They wondered, “Why won’t they talk to me?” I pondered along with them, suggesting the possibility that these friends and family members are not sure how to relate to them. I was met with a face full of heartache and bewilderment.

And the exclamation, “But I’m still ME!”

I have thought about that conversation UMPTEEN TIMES since then.

Am I still ME when I make poor or even sinful choices?

Of course I am! I am a unique and beautiful creation, made in the image of God. NOTHING changes that.

God has a purpose and plan for each of us. Sadly, sin is part of our world. As a result, brokenness, woundedness, and pain are a constant affliction. On this side of heaven, it is impossible to live God’s perfect plan for my life. As a Jesus-follower, I strive for holiness, in His power. But I still make some poor and sinful choices.

Plenty of my choices have invisible consequences. For example: I sometimes tend towards being judgmental. Most of the time, I keep these thoughts to myself (unless my face talks out loud!) However, I have experienced the invisible consequences of damaged relationships and hurting those I care about.

But I have a long history of struggling with a shortcoming that has much more conspicuous repercussions.

I started stress eating as a middle school kid. During that same time period, I started noticing other girls my age who were thinner than I was. A lifetime cycle of shame regarding my weight and attempts at dieting began. Sometimes, my efforts were successful. Often, they were a colossal failure. By the time I decided I could not live this way anymore, I was considered morbidly obese. I was diagnosed with metabolic syndrome, my blood pressure and blood sugar were trending up, and my cholesterol was through the roof. My back and feet hurt all the time, I had poor exercise tolerance, and waning energy. And I was still gaining weight.

I had only myself to blame. A lifetime of poor choices had landed me in a grim spot.

But even in a body abused by binging, too many sweets, and lack of exercise, I was STILL ME! I was not living to my potential…I was too tired and often depressed. But God never stopped loving me; neither did my friends and family.

(If you want to know more about my journey with obesity, subscribe to my blog!:)

I am profoundly grateful to the precious people who love and support me. My tribe has been a large part of my success in my trek out of obesity. They all loved me as ME, without asking the number on the scale. No one demanded I be a certain size to qualify for friendship.

My burning question is this: WHY ARE SOME SINS MORE ACCEPTABLE? It is ludicrous to suggest we spurn someone because they have too much anxiety. Or use words we do not approve of. Or drink more caffeine than is good for them. Or have a higher-than-healthy weight.

So why do we look askance at the person with pink spiky hair and gauges in their ears? Avoid the person we know is doing drugs? Flat-out refuse to speak to the transgender neighbor? And what about the family member making choices we think are wrong?

I want to point us back to the fact that every person is created in the image of God. Every person deserves love, respect, and kindness. Besides, God calls us to be Jesus to the hurting and lost people of the world. I challenge us to remember: the exterior you see on a person is not a reflection of their authentic self and who God created them to be. Be willing to look for what is underneath and treasure who that person truly is. And then help them discover who they are meant to be.

Matthew 25:40-And the King will answer them, “Truly, I say to you, as you did it to one of the least of these, you did it to me.” (ESV)

8 Comments

  1. Great blog- so true and honest!!!
    We all have the same issue- why is looking outward so much easier than looking inward!!!

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